-
How to Stop Overthinking and Driving Yourself Crazy
“But, what if…?” It’s the kiss of death for your mental health, especially if you’re an overthinker who’s been mentally and emotionally beaten down. For me, I wanted to know why the person who promised to be my world was so delighted to hurt me. And I wanted to know what I’d done to “deserve” it. Why wasn’t I enough, and, mostly, what the hell just happened? Sadly, many of us won’t get that closure. And let’s be real — if you had the chance to ask the questions, would you trust the answers? When you’re coming out of a toxic relationship (of any kind) with someone who’s deliberately spun…
-
Getting Out: Reclaiming Your Turf after Abuse
Reclaiming your favorite restaurants. That song you both loved. The gym where you worked out together. Your people. It can be more than your heart (and overthinking head) can take. Too bad you can’t hide in bed and avoid the ghosts of your once-happiness… Unfortunately, it’s not that easy. And you’ve got bills to pay. Reclaiming your personal space after the end of an abusive relationship can be challenging, but it’s totally manageable. Reclaiming the rest of the world, however, might feel downright impossible. Don’t be discouraged, though. Take a deep breath. Stop shaking. Unclench your jaw. (Your dentist is going to be pissed about that later, too.) Pull your…
-
Finding My Happy: Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
Until recently, it’d been a long time since I can remember being genuinely happy. I mean, I thought I was happy for a minute, but with every conversation-turned-yelling-match-for-no reason or every time I got called a “liar” or a “piece of shit,” I couldn’t stay in denial about what was happening in my life. The Power of Therapy Two years ago, I started going to therapy because I was so jacked up from from the “relationship” I was in. Throughout the entire time we were together, if you can call it that, I endured verbal, emotional, and mental abuse near-daily for over three years, most of which he justified as…
-
Red Flags, My Favorite Flower
It took me a long time to sort my introverted narcissist out for the monster he is. Of course, part of that was my own denial. I loved him. I didn’t want to believe it. Besides, we had that one good day that one time five weeks ago. Isn’t that worth fighting for?! Sigh. Back then, red flags were my favorite flower, and he showered me in them. Had I known better, I’d have been on the lookout for these signs you’re dealing with a narcissist (or person with narcissistic traits). Gaslighting Gaslighting is usually the first way to tell the thing, as long as you can recognize it for…
